Maybe I, Leda Johnson, have been given something wonderful but just can’t see it—like being handed the keys to the Space Shuttle and then just driving it up and down the huge runway in Florida complaining about how hard it is to turn. Maybe since Todd is a good friend, is it possible my dream already came true—just not in the way I would like?
For all those who have had a friend they wished was more . . .
Leda Johnson is in 8th grade, and she has a bad case of unrequited love. If you don’t know what “unrequited” means, never fear. Leda has a close relationship with the dictionary, she’ll get you the definition if you don’t know what a word means.
unrequited. adj. something which is not returned or repaid in the same manner, as in unrequited love.
This summer, at my church’s Bible camp, I spent the week with the junior high girls (of which there were only three). These three girls were an interesting group. None of them were popular, none of them wore makeup, and all of them were worried about being the one who talks too much. But even more unique, there was not a single boy’s name dropped in a nervously excited manner, there were no quick looks to the boy’s side of the chapel, there was no quiet snickering and pointed fingers. Well . . . there may have been some quiet snickering, but that’s just because we were the camp pranksters.
There is a blessed time in life, before boys exist in our minds, that a boy’s physical presence does not bother or impress us, make us nervous or anxious, or cause emotional woe. Then there is the great change in which something happens (be it slowly or overnight) and we begin to see those boys across the aisle as something more than just a boy or merely a friend. The possibilities of the future all of a sudden come into sharp focus, and we begin to want something more than just friendship (or at least, some of us do).
This is the predicament Leda Johnson has found herself in, and with the new year she has decided to write in her new diary about it. Oh, and she’s going to write about cats too because she really wants one and there’s a mysterious gray one that sits on the porch sometimes.
Could friendship be its own kind of love?
Friendship is one of those amazing gifts of the Lord, provided to us so graciously, that we often, often take advantage of. I have realized recently what an enormous blessing it is to have good and godly friends who live close and have lived close for many years. Leda appreciates her friends too, Ruby and Todd specifically. But there’s something Ruby has that Leda doesn’t (a boyfriend) and there’s something Todd doesn’t know that Leda does (Leda has a serious crush on Todd).
As I began reading this book, I was prepared for a little bit of cotton-candy, ooey-gooey junior high girl gushing about boys. Happily, there was a great deal less fluffy pining and a great deal more character development! This really isn’t too surprising, Owl’s Nest Publishers and their authors craft and put forward great literature. I don’t expect them to promote a book for middle grade girls that is full only of boy craziness and silly obsessions. Leda, while being honest with herself about her crush, gradually learns to dwell on more important things. She is an example to girls of how we can mentally process what is happening around us. For instance, in one journal entry she writes:
Today in church we sang “On Eagle’s Wings.” And I wondered if someday in the future, I might look back and see I was in the palm of God’s hand all the time. Even when I didn’t feel like it.
Maybe especially when I didn’t feel like it.
This book isn’t full to the brim of scripture references, neither is it pointing to the Lord very overtly. However, the characters attend a Christian school and church comes up each Sunday. This brings a more subtle understanding that God is holding Leda, whether she “feels” it or not. This is a deep truth that all young women can be greatly encouraged by, subtle or not! What we as emotional creatures need to hear more than anything is that God does not change with our emotions or our mood swings. He is still the same good, strong, and kind God that He always has been, no matter what is happening with us, our friends, or our crushes.
As Leda’s character develops, we see also her understanding of friendship change and deepen. Though she struggles with the fact that Ruby is dating and she is not, Leda still invests in their friendship and realizes that Ruby has not left her behind. Ruby is a gem of a friend (pun absolutely intended), one that laughs and giggles with Leda, but also encourages her even though she has what Leda doesn’t. Girls need the example of love that is free from (or at least confesses and turns from) jealousy in their relationships with their female friends.
But what about friendships with boys? What a quandary they propose when we aren’t careful to keep our minds focused on Christ and instead fix our eyes on those junior high boys. Even in her relationship with Todd, Leda realizes that perhaps we don’t look at those boys accurately. Perhaps we come to those relationships with wrong ideas of what they are for. Here’s another portion of a journal entry:
I suddenly realized that up until that moment I had always thought that friendship with a boy was just a smaller, weaker version of romantic love—something that if it got bigger and more powerful would become romance.
The question Leda raises is this: could friendship be its own kind of love? And the answer is a resounding, yes. We love and care for our friends! There should absolutely be a difference between friendship love and romantic love, as Leda learns with Todd. This is what we see in her final journal entry, a recognition of friendship as loving and unassuming. To remove the idea of romance from our relationships with boys in junior high (and beyond!) is a wise caution and makes for a good book.
To read or not to read?
Devin Brown has crafted a sweet little novel that is cheerful, funny, and just a little dramatic. If that’s not the perfect style for middle grade girls, then I give up finding literature for teens!
Leda’s journals are interesting and full of the typical junior high experience. I haven’t even mentioned the thread throughout of the mysterious gray cat on the porch. A bookish cat-lover experiencing eighth grade – why couldn’t this book have been around when I was that age?! Oh well, at least you can share this with the junior high girls in your life!
Though not as grounded in scripture and soaked in the Christian’s calling in life as much as Brooke Bartz’s wonderful book Godly Ever After, Devin Brown’s Not Exactly Love encourages its readers to look beyond the worldly idea of temporal, romantic love to see the beauty of friendship and the subtle but real comfort of the Lord’s holding us through all things great and small (even a junior high crush).
Until next time, go read this good book!
