Uncharted (2022)
Starring: Tom Holland, Mark Wahlburg, Antonio Banderas
Director: Ruben Fleischer
Rating: PG-13 for language, action, and violence
The number of children who want to grow up to be Indiana Jones is probably astronomical. I haven’t met many people (if any at all) who disliked the adventure, mishap, and comedy of those movies. The narrative and story-line presented in these movies has the ability to become a repetitive cookie-cutter genre though. Before walking into the movie theater to see Uncharted with my mother and brother last week, my general impression from a few brief reviews consisted of rather neutral opinions. No rave reviews, no horrific backlashes. It’s not a new idea, new plot-form, new character study, or anything spectacular. But enjoyable? I think so.
Summary
Nate’s big brother Sam left 10 years ago. He promised to come visit, to keep in touch, to come take Nate away from the orphanage one day. But after 10 years, Nate is just a small, pick-pocketing thief working nights at a bar. True, he’s a bar-working thief with a lot of historical understanding and treasure-related knowledge, but he’s still just that: a bar-working thief.
Then along comes Sully, a man with major trust issues and a recruitment offer. Treasure hunting – right up Nate’s alley. In fact, it’s even in Nate’s area of expertise: Ferdinand Magellan’s secret stash of gold. What are we waiting for? Let’s hop on that plane and find that treasure.
For what it’s worth . . .
Before I start tackling the actual story-telling here, I need to address one major issue with this film: language. It’s true that I have watched movies with a plethora of much worse language; however, as a family film the nearly 30 usages of s–t seemed like overkill. Perhaps I cling too closely to the innocence of Tom Holland’s Spider-Man, but it seems odd to hear all these words coming out of Holland’s mouth. Sure, the Marvel films are not Holland’s only area of experience, for instance I know Cherry won’t be going on my watch list. Still, it feels odd, foreign, and a little disappointing. A few other minor curse words are thrown out from time to time, but the main concern is the near constant usage of the s-word. It adds up to hearing that word every 4-5 minutes for the nearly two hours of film.
Besides the language, I was pleased with the content. There were 2-3 suggestive comments that would be picked up only if you were really paying attention (I nearly missed all of them, and I was specifically trying to pay attention to these kinds of things.) We see some revealing outfits and one woman in a bikini. In one scene, two characters are dressed in a manner that suggests they might go to bed together; however, the scene takes an immediate turn away from that thought and suggests nothing at all beyond one character’s minor crush on another character.
Violence is frequent throughout, but mild and relatively bloodless. A few characters’ throats are slit, but we don’t see any grisly images. There’s the typical fist, knife, gun, and even sword fights found in these films. Suffice it to say, while seeing a few men get hit by large cargo boxes at a distance just makes your face hurt, there is nothing disturbing about the violence here.
One last comment, for Tom Holland’s sake. I’m sure he is aware of what has been done with his image and he perhaps is not bothered by it; however, I for one am sad to see the female community ogle over the body and physique of such a young man. I saw an ad for Uncharted pop up on Instagram around Valentine’s Day listing ten reasons why we should watch Tom Holland’s new movie. All ten reasons were flashes of him shirtless, working out. Are we aware, ladies, that while we are screaming about our bodies being objectified by the opposite sex we at the same time are letting our gazes linger on the cut body of a man we are never going to date or marry? If Hollywood spliced together an ad with cuts of a woman working out in a bikini to advertise a new movie, would we not screech loudly in the streets the need to boycott their newest film? Consistency, especially as Believers, is the name of the game.
While there is really only one short scene that is a workout-montage of Tom Holland shirtless, I am truly saddened that film makers use his physique to draw the female audience in. I’m not disagreeing with the world about Holland’s attractiveness. He is a good looking young man; however, I have watched his movies because of the quality of his acting and the absolute fun I have watching his whimsical, naive characters. Take the hint Hollywood – there are other ways to keep an audience (even females) entertained in an action/adventure film.
Quality of the Story
This film will not be a sensation. It’s not going to impress story-tellers or captivate audiences for years to come. Truly, it’s nothing we haven’t seen before: it’s comparable to Indiana Jones, National Treasure, and Lara Croft: Tomb Raider. That doesn’t mean this movie isn’t enjoyable, Uncharted certainly produces a few good laughs. The twists and turns are predictable enough. In fact, one of our main characters, Sully (played by Mark Wahlburg), just about asks us to be ready for the twists when he says repeatedly that he trusts absolutely no one.
In their review, the daily Christian journalism group The World and Everything In It mentioned their appreciation for Uncharted‘s nods to Tom Holland’s Spider-Man with some flashy chase scenes and parkour elements. I certainly agree with their comments, and thoroughly enjoyed seeing Holland get to wear his super-hero-like shoes for a few scenes.
To Watch or Not to Watch
I have mentioned before that language in a movie does not particularly bother me. I’m around it all day – so much so, I almost don’t hear it unless I’m specifically paying attention. A good friend asked me to make note of the curse-count and violence level when I went to the theater so she could decide if she wanted to watch it. Ultimately, it was disappointing to hear the s-word so often. That for me is not a turn off. However, many will want to reconsider and not head to the theater for this one. A possibility for you though, consider watching with a service like VidAngel that can remove language!
I personally was refreshed by the lack of many suggestive comments, and ZERO implied or actual sex scenes. How rare! Combine that with low-level violence, and you’ve got a new Friday night favorite for your older teenagers.
Until next time, go read a good book! 🙂
